Friday, February 24, 2012


I am going through a 'strange' season.  We all have them, or at least I think we all do.  Lately,  I have been in 'the rabbit hole' where things don't seem quite as they should be. Some peoples logic and justification on how they treat others seems warped (or at least from my perspective).  One such incident happened this week.  I was looking forward to getting to know a person that I thought would make a great friend when out of the blue this person alienated me.  I was shocked, stunned and hurt.  The thing that disappointed me the most about the sudden alienation was the removal of what I thought would be a future close friend and confidante.  Although my faith is not founded in people, I have not yet evolved enough to allow myself to not get hurt by their actions.  I am working on that.  I wanted the friendship so bad that I did not listen to what this person was saying.  Had I taken the time to truly listen I would have known what fate would bestow upon me for this person had treated every one else who started to get close to them the same way.  Hurting people hurt people. It is as simple as that.  I would have loved to have helped them, but alas, it is not my job to fix people when they do not want to be fixed.  Please don't get me wrong, I am certainly not perfect.  I am broken too.  I believe we are all broken to different degrees, it is all simply a matter of picking up our pieces and trying to put them back in place in the best way that we can. Perhaps I should work on my own listening skills for life's lessons come in many forms.  If you resist learning your lessons in their gentler forms, life is more than prepared to teach you through ever-increasing hardships. I think my lesson from this particular situation would be to work on my listening skills and work on my own thoughts that I allow to run amuck in my head at times.
Time to let go of the tree.
I say this saying to myself while I am running the beach and I find my thoughts wandering to a past hurt.
Let go of the tree.
Same thing with yoga, meditation, driving or anytime I find my thoughts going back to the unchangeable past.
Let go of the tree.
The tree story comes from a book I read called 'The Four Desires' by Rod Stryker.  The story goes something like this; An old man was out in the woods, while there a great storm came upon him.  The next day the villagers came out to survey their surroundings and realized that the old man was not among them and they went in search of him.  They found him out in the woods yelling "help me, help me!" Clinging to a tree in the bright sunshine, the old man yelled, "This tree will not let go of me!"
During the storm, the old man clung to the tree, but after the storm the old man refused to let go of his tree, even blaming the tree.  The thing that saved his life could have potentially become his fatal downfall.
Time to let go of the tree.
How someone treats you is a reflection of how they view themselves.  So when someone does something hurtful to you remember, it is generally not about you, only about them. Don't  take it personal and try to react with compassion. I don't know a lot, but one thing I do know is that there are a lot of hurting people out there and if we are not allowed to help them, then we must let go of the situation, focus inward and pay close attention to our own thoughts about them and the situation.
There are numerous scientific studies about thoughts and their impact on overall health.  Did you know that when you think of a past hurt your body releases the same stress hormones as it did when the actual event took place.  The body cannot differentiate what the mind is thinking versus the actual event!  Stress is believed to be the root cause of all disease!  So it is very important to think about what you are thinking so that you do not do your body any further harm.   This also falls under ahimsa: Do no harm.  Do no harm not only means to not hurt others, but do not hurt yourself as well!  So it is very healthful to keep a close watch on your thoughts.
When a hurtful situation presents itself to you focus on the lessons that have revealed themselves to you and what you could learn from the situation.  This turns the hurt into an opportunity to improve yourself  and thus the hurt then becomes a blessing and you will be better equipped to handle with grace the next time something similar happens.
If I could leave you with just one thought from this blog it would be this.
Let go of your tree my friend, the storm has passed.


  1. Annette, thank you so much for sharing this - this is exactly what I needed to read tonight.

    1.'re welcome Green Girl. Glad I could help. There is no better compliment than someone who says that my blog helped in some small way. Hope you are doing well :)

  2. I like the simple honesty of your writing, Annette. You step out and share what an experience feels like for you, rather than projecting it onto the other person or experience. Powerful stuff. You said "focus on the lessons that have revealed themselves" so that the hurt/experience becomes a blessing. Love that. And sometimes it means some deep inner work so that we don't blame others for what is in reality our own growth potential. Here's to letting go of the tree! :-) _/\_

  3. Nice Post. Thanks for sharing your experience. Good work keep it up

    Hope you will done much better in future...

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